The summer of 2014 was a busy one. The planning and prepping that surrounded our four family weddings lead me to anxiously desire one thing; calm. I knew I would get it, I was sure of it. As the year drew to an end I could taste normalcy. I saw lazy Saturday’s, casual family dinners, and peaceful Sunday mornings on the horizon. I was ready to focus on my infant marriage and excited to navigate new family dynamics. Then, everything changed. I was completely unprepared for the challenges of 2015 I was completely unprepaired for the challenges of 2015; my fathers death, the purchase, remodel and…
The Precipice of Year Two
I haven’t formally written about my dad for a multitude of reasons. Perhaps it’s the finality of black and white; the irrefutable truth of a perfectly formed word. Maybe it’s the sharp edges of four seemingly insignificant letters that, in sequence, are capable of crumbling my silly existence. Dead. Four letters that are more heart wrenching than a memory and heavier than a foot stone. This is the most painful and agonizing piece I’ve ever written. I want no part of it, the words are unreal if unspoken. Here it goes… September 19, 2014 was a whirlwind of contradicting emotions. Shock, fear, hope, despair, love, desperation, confusion, peace, restlessness, denial….